What is your most memorable track experience? Is it your very first one, is it getting your knees down or simply getting your brand new bike on the track? Ours go something like this; we were invited by the good people at AGMC to their BMW-exclusive track day, offering us the scintillating new S1000RR demo bike for a ride. “It’s only for a couple of laps”, they said. Of course, we gladly accepted it. Who in their right mind wouldn’t? Where’s the “HP4” we mentioned in the title, you ask? That is exactly why this is the one to remember.

If you’re living in Dubai or elsewhere in the UAE for some time, you know that this city has its own perks! Sunny mornings all year long, lovely people, beautiful sea, fantastic beaches and, yes, track days. Track days on Dubai Autodrome to be more specific. Sited some 20 odd kilometres from the city center, it’s the perfect getaway for the all kinds of petrolheads.

We arrived at around 12pm, and were immediately greeted by a big group of BMW riders occupying the paddock area. Everybody’s excitement is so high that you can clearly feel it. It’s somewhat similar to that nervous feeling before your first date or final exams, multiplied by 10! The beginners are rewinding pictures from their past life while advanced riders ask themselves if they could take Turn 16 just a little bit faster, while pictures from the past life keep playing in the background.

Everything starts off with a briefing; for the first timers to know their head from their a**, and for the advanced rides to remind them they aren’t invincible. The rules are carefully explained and all the questions are answered, so that nobody will do anything stupid. Having said that, we felt the briefing get over really quick, and we’re sure lots of new riders didn’t even hear most of the do’s and don’ts, with all that adrenaline blocking their hearing.

That over, we went outside and tried to relax. S1000RR on the Dubai track? Hell yeah! And now comes the twist. Our great friend Ali showed up on his latest toy, the rather infamous S1000RR HP4 aka “Possibly the best and fastest motorcycle in the world today”. “Dimitry, go out on this session, I’ll rest for a little bit” Ali says. Am I hearing this correctly, Ali wants me to ride 105,000 dirhams worth of ABS/TC/DDC crotch-rocket on the track? Yes please, the stupid side of my brain responded immediately. Leathers and helmet on, off we go. The bike is set in Sport Mode, which translates to full power (that’s around 200 horsepower) and Traction Control in the mild setting (that’s if Ali hasn’t messed around with the settings). What looks like a full-on Akrapovič exhaust system is sitting nicely behind my leg, and that should add around 5 more horses to the total output. Let’s start slowly to get a feel for the bike, shall we? First two laps are sighting laps, so that we can get familiarized with the track. A short dash back to the pits and then it’s back on track for one of my best life experiences. Ever.

We rode the International track configuration, a nicely laid out 4.39km stretch with two long straights and a couple of complex curves connecting them. At this point, I need to get a hold of myself and my emotions or this feature will be judiciously sprinkled with swear words. Let’s first cover the experience.

If you are a real gasoline junky, you must do this at least once in your lifetime. Here’s a simple explanation. One moment you’re grinning like a school boy on a nudist beach, only to call your mother’s name in fear the next. The sensations that you get on the bike are something that you simply cannot have on anything else fueled by petrol. The connection you have with this machine is almost like a magical bond with an animal that listens to (or don’t) exactly what you tell it to do. You lean into the corner and point the knee towards the tarmac, and in just one short moment, you are world champion Valentino Rossi and Jorge Lorenzo combined together. Come the turn, and you find yourself holding on for dear life, cursing Vale and Jorge because they pushed you too much. And that repeats itself every lap, for 20 minutes. You could say that it’s not that big a time, but on a crazy fast bike like this and a demanding track, it felt more like an eternity. Plenty enough.

And what about the bike? How effectively did the DDS work? ABS? Traction Control? How does it compare to the standard BMW S1000RR? You know what, I can’t give you any juicy revelations simply because I’m not a professional rider who judges bikes by laps and milliseconds. I can barely put my knee down, but I’ll tell you this. The S1000RR HP4 is epic, it is flawless. It carried me around the track at ridiculous speeds and took me back to the pit in one piece without doing a single thing wrong. Yes, it’ll probably bite if you push it hard out of a corner. It will reach close to 300 km/h on the main straight and then brake so hard that your eyeballs literally pop out, lap after lap. But it will do it in such a composed manner, that a junior/mid-lever rider can enjoy it way beyond his own abilities. This bike will care for you; it will help you brake harder without losing control, accelerate more without braking traction, and lean further without falling. World champion? Better than that.

Read all about it and watch videos. Tell yourself that it is extremely dangerous and deadly. Scare yourself even. And then go and buy a sports bike, preferably the S1000RR HP4, and take it to the track. You’ll know what the hell we’re talking about!

Did we mention that Ali offered us one more session? You’re the man!